Haiku

Haiku serve no purpose whatsoever. How is it that some guy on a power trip centuries ago decided poems should have 5-7-5 phrasing, and people have gone along with this for centuries? Personally, should I choose to write poetry, or any kind of writing for that matter, I will use however many syllables in a line as it takes.

Believe it or not,
some of my thoughts have more than
seven syllables.

Writing a haiku is like giving Monet a paint by numbers. All it does is block creative flow, and the end product is amateur-at-best. I believe the first run on sentence must have come from a student who was forced to read haiku. "This will show em! Syllable restrictions? Not a chance. Separate lines? Nope. Periods? Is a chicken's butt pork?" I would much rather read a run on sentence than a haiku. Run-on sentences keep me interested. It's like, "man...where is this period? Its gotta be coming up soon....don't peek down the page! Resist the urge!" Where as haiku take me FOREVER to read, because smart-ass that I am, I always go back and count the syllables hoping to discover some flaw. As if these things haven't been proofread before. It never occurs to me that I might not be the first one to check this.

Frustrating as they are to write, I think it would be awesome for a judge to deliver an opinion in haiku form. It would entertain law students forever.

By definition
Detrimental reliance
Does not apply here.

While said judge would be mocked by their peers, and perhaps loathed by future law students, I would salute them. I realize the likelihood of this ever happening is slim, so it might have to be my own undertaking some day. So if you are me reading this 50 years from now, well done sir. Past-Tizzle gives you a time-warp fist pound.