I'd like to take a couple minutes to write about my nicknamesake, Michael Phelps. Just a couple short months ago, Phelpsie was on top of the world. 8 gold medals in one Olympics. Book deals, talk show appearances, sponsors, sponsors, sponsors. If you asked most people, they probably would have said he was a pretty good role model, willing to forgive and forget his past DUI.
We all know what has happened in the last two weeks. Well, new details about that house party came out today. Some members of the band who played at the party reported that Phelps was drinking, smoking, and bet $2,000 on a game of beer pong (which he subsequently lost). Alcohol, drugs, and gambling are common vices for athletes. Is it really a surprise that the man who dominates all four strokes in the pool gets brought down by the BadPR Trifecta? All I know for sure is this - that college kid who stood across the table from Phelpsie, beat him in beer pong, and took 2 grand in cash off him had better get some action. In fact I've inserted (no pun intended) that into my list of "Top stories to get you action." They are as follows
1. "I survived a shark attack. Wanna see my scars?"
2. "You know, you really can't appreciate life until you see Earth from outer space..."
3. "I beat Michael Phelps in beer pong with $4,000 on the table. I tried to get one of his gold medals, but he didn't have any on him. Ain't no thing.
Note: Number three replaces "I play baseball for the Yankees and make $27.5 million a year." Word on the street is those drugs don't enhance all kinds of performance.
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