I discovered something disturbing this afternoon. I walked into McDonald's looking forward to a double cheeseburger off the dollar menu. I was shocked to find it not on the dollar menu, but there was something called a "McDouble." Figuring they might have just changed the name, I quickly scanned the rest of the menu for "double cheeseburger." There is was, under sandwiches...for $1.19!!!!! I was shockergasted (a combination of shocked and flabbergasted). So I asked the cashier what exactly a McDouble was. She informed me it had two patties and one slice of cheese. Yes it appears the "McDouble" is a double cheeseburger...minus one slice of cheese.
And so I reach another installment of "Whatever, I Do What I Want." This one goes out to you, McDonalds. I hope that you can sleep at night knowing you are depriving millions of Americans their second slice of cheese. In a world of cutting corners, I never expected it to come to this. Well you know what, McDonalds? Your plan BACKFIRED! By taking off that second piece of cheese, and altering the crucial cheese ratio, you allow the taste of your "beef" to shine through, unmasked by American goodness. And you know what, McDonalds? Your "beef" just doesn't cut it for me. Asking customers to pay an extra 19 cents for a second slice of cheese on a double cheeseburger is vicious with a side of piracy. I have to suspect that the Hamburgler is behind this move. Ronald would never approve something like this.
McDouble makes this sandwich sound much cooler than it actually is. Chamburger is more accurate. Cheeseburger + hamburger = chamburger. Well I hope you enjoy this marketing plan, McDonalds, because the next time I find myself with a craving for a warmish, beef-like product, you can find me at Burger King. This has been "Whatever, I Do What I Want: McDonald's Edition."
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