Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Late Night Boatwright Fashion

On this week's edition of Late Night at Boatwright, I've decided to do a little profile on people who walk through the door of the second floor quiet study room. The second floor quiet study room is generally pretty quiet, save the ironically loud door to the men's room, which SLAMS shut loudly unless you close it carefully. The bathrooms in the quiet room mean that people are walking in and out every few minutes.

It's that awkward time of year in Virginia where you don't really know if today it's going to be 72 degrees or 50 degrees. Yesterdays temperature is of little guidance, as the temperature can hop from one extreme to another and back again in a Canadian summer. And so it is the perfect time of year to document something that we all exhibit (some more than others): FASHION.

What follows are the outfits of actual students walking in and out of the Boatwright Library study room.

Gender: Male
Pants: Jeans. Frayed on the bottom, one hole on the backside, one hole on the knee. The smart money says he purchased them in that condition. Sidebar: I think I could probably make a decent living running a business where people bring me their jeans in good condition and I make them "stylish" by tearing holes in them, fraying the bottom, and...well...let's just say I'd find a way to give them that gross yellow tint.
Shirt: Beige striped polo, short sleved. Pretty standard around these parts. Not that I should talk.
Accessories: Gray scarf. Because I cannot tell you how many times my forearms are hot by neck is freezing cold. If you are going to make the statement to the world that you value fashion over academics, at least match your colors. C'mon man.

Gender: Female
Pants: Black tights. The recent tights-as-pants trend unstoppable. I see about 20 girls a day that clearly think tights are pants. The summer before I left for college, I was talking to my grandma on the phone and she asked if I had enough khakis and dress pants, because she didn't think kids should be allowed to wear jeans to class under a dress code. All I can say is Grandma you would be shocked and appalled walking around campus some days.
Shoes: Ugg boots. Of course. The "perfect" compliment to tights-as-pants. Sidebar: I really need to invent a font that conveys sarcasm. Seriously. There is no sarcasm in that sentiment. See how difficult it is? Anyway, I guess tights-and-ugg-boots makes more sense than a short jean skirt and ugg boots. For that logic, see Mr. Polo shirt and scarf above.

Gender: Male
Shirt: Plain white undershirt. Not under anything.
Pants: Black track pants with three white stripes down the side.
Sandals: Black sandals with three white stripes.
Why it WORKS: The stripes on the pants and sandals are somehow staying perfectly aligned when he walks. It's pretty incredible. My hat is off to you, sir.

Gender: Female
Pants: Black tights. Again.
Shoes: Ugg Boots. Again.
Shirt: Couldn't see, because she had a bright pink raincoat on. It is not raining, as we are indoors. Even outside, it has not rained for days. So why the raincoat? In addition to the pink raincoat, this girl is also sporting one of the saddest frowns I have seen in quite some time. I mean, it's 1:30 AM at the library. No one is really happy. But I feel really bad for this girl - she looks really down. Which I guess explains the raincoat, as she must have a tiny raincloud following her around everywhere. It's the only explanation. I hope things get better, raincoat girl!

Gender: Female
Pants: Wesleyan sweatpants
Shirt: Yale T-shirt
Hat: U of R hat
Someone is confused.

That's all for now. When it comes to weather and outfits, tomorrow is certainly a new day.