Sunday, May 30, 2010

The Flying Squirrels and Best Come-Out Songs

I'm proud to say I attended my first Flying Squirrels game this weekend. For those who may not know, the Flying Squirrels are Richmond's minor league baseball team. While there are certainly mixed feelings about having a team named the Flying Squirrels, few can deny that with $6 tickets, its a great way to spend an afternoon with a group of friends.

When you get to a certain level in baseball, you get to choose what is known as a come-out song. When you come up to bat, the announcer will say "Now batting, the center fielder, #24, Horace Giggins!" and a sound clip will play as you walk to the plate and get ready to hit. It's a song clip, and while the length can very, last night's were roughly 10 seconds long. It got me thinking about what would be my come-out song if I was a baseball player.

And so I present, in no particular order, my top-10 come out songs:
1. The National Anthem. Everyone would stand and remove their hats every time you came to the plate.
2. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.
3. Superfreak, by Rick James. No lyrics, just the instrumental that sounds virtually identical to Can't Touch This, thus leaving the whole stadium wondering which song it actually was.
4. Anything by N'SYNC. I believe one of the visiting players last night had "It's Gonna Be Me." Props to you, sir.
5. Say My Name by Destiny's Child. How could I leave my all-time favorite song off a list like this?
6. 10 seconds of crickets chirping.
7. Afternoon Delight, as sung by the cast of Anchorman.
8. Baby, by Justin Bieber.
9. Soulja Boy Tell'Em - Birdwalk. I dare you not to dance up to the plate while this song is playing.
10. Party in the USA. Miley Cyrus. It had to be done.

I highly recommend a trip to the Diamond to see the Flying Squirrels to anyone in Richmond. It's a great time.

Friday, May 28, 2010

Surprise Nutrients

I never understood why they put nutrition facts on bottles of water. They just tell you that the water you are drinking is just that...water. 0 calories, 0 fat, 0 sodium, 0 carbs, and 0 protein. I always figured it was just some legal requirement.

You can imagine by surprise when I glanced at the nutrition facts of my bottle of "Pure American" water today and saw a number other than 0 below the solid black line. That's right. My bottle of water provides me with 4% of my daily value of calcium.

At first I was just straight-up surprised. I was just not expecting anything in my water. But I must say I'm totally on board. I think more food and drinks should have surprise nutrients.
You thought you were just getting a bagel? Boom! 10% Riboflavin!
This brownie is great, are these walnuts? Yup...and an extra 6% Magnesium!
This coffee tastes like iron. Maybe the beans were burnt...or maybe its the extra 300% Iron!

Win win win. Caroline was quick to point out that you could just buy your vitamins. Sensible? Perhaps. As much fun as surprise nutrients? Not a chance. When I open my restaurant, "Stick It To Me," not only will every dish be served on a stick, but dishes will have surprise nutrients. If variety is the spice of life, then surprise nutrients are the spice of health.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Glee Update

I know it's been a while. My apologies. I'd like to say I got back all by myself, but the push from Carolyn definitely helped.

May means the end of many TV shows for the summer, and while most have finished up, there is one excellent show that still has a couple weeks to go. I speak, of course, of Glee. Glee has gotten off to a solid start this season. After an excellent first two episodes, I was less than thrilled for a couple weeks, but NPH and GaGa week brought it back up to standard. You may know that NPH and Lady Gaga are two of my favorite people of all time, so that should come as no surprise. But the show is back on track with quality songs, and some more entertaining plot lines than "Rachel likes 3 boys."

Of course one development has also been super awesome, and I was suggested to talk about it by my newest reader, the most excellent Quimbilicious. The show finally utilizing the Jane Lynch as a singer. We got NONE of that in season 1. I guess the producers finally realized that Sue is well loved by Gleeks everywhere. Not only has she been featured more prominently in Season 2 as a whole, but they have let her sing. Vogue and Physical were awesome, and I really do hope there is more to come. Jane has sung in her other works.

I must give a tip of my hat to the writers for FINALLY utilizing some of their talent. I'll never understand what you were thinking putting the best dancer on the cast in a wheelchair, but you are making some strides. Bad Romance showed you can actually have a song sung by the girls and not by Rachel and some others here and there. I think it might have been the first song that Rachel was a part of, but you didn't really hear her on many solo lines. Kurt, Tina, and Santana got some well deserved time.

Casting Idina as Rachel's mother was excellent as well. So keep it up, Glee. I want more Sue and more Sue singing. I will not take no for an answer. And by that, I mean yeah, there's not a lot I can do but I will be really happy if there's more Sue!

More to come later. Hopefully it will not be as long as the last gap.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

CNN Headlines - The Struggle

When I'm browsing around the Internet, I often go to, not only to find out what's going on in the world, but to scan for ridiculous headlines. Last year, it was an absolute gold mine. I could put together a whole post with 10 ridiculous CNN headlines on any given day.

Maybe there's been a change in focus against personal interest stories. Maybe there is just too much actual news these days. Either way, it's been a struggle as of late for me. CNN just hasn't delivered the ridiculousness that I'm used to. But after receiving my very own CNN headline ("William & Mary grads hit big on YouTube parody"), I really can't stay mad at them.

Earlier this month however, I got lucky. Within two days of each other, posted what I consider to be two of the greatest headlines I have ever read:

"Bear stuck in tree, LIVE" (with a video link!)
The next day...
"Bobcat gets out, zoo opens anyway"

I can tell what you're thinking, and the answer is yes. I most certainly DID click on the video link. They had live coverage of a bear stuck in a tree. Unfortunately, I was a little too late, the bear had already been tranquilized and was on the ground being attended to.

After the bear headline, I didn't think it could get better, but the bobcat flat out blew me away. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it - greatest headline ever. Thank you, CNN. While the national relevance of your stories may be increasing your gem of ridiculousness keep me coming back.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Cutting Corners

I had what can only be described as a frustrating experience at Burger King today. After months of intense marketing for their $1 double cheeseburger, BK has done away with it - raising the price and instead offering a new sandwich, the "Buck Double" for a dollar. The Buck Double is a double cheeseburger minus one slice of cheese. If this all sounds familiar, it should. McDonalds did the same thing in February of '09.

Well apparently its ok to cut corners. Therefore, rather than present a new blog post about my current feelings for Burger King, I've copied and pasted my February 2009 post about McDonalds, and replaced the words "McDonald's" and "McDouble" with "Burger King" and "Buck Double," respectively. 2 other changed were made only once: "Ronald" was replaced with "The King," and you may notice Burger King is replaced by Wendy's. Congratulations, BK. The "edited repost" is as follows:

I discovered something disturbing this afternoon. I walked into Burger King looking forward to a double cheeseburger off the dollar menu. I was shocked to find it not on the dollar menu, but there was something called a "Buck Double." Figuring they might have just changed the name, I quickly scanned the rest of the menu for "double cheeseburger." There is was, under sandwiches...for $1.29!!!!! I was shockergasted (a combination of shocked and flabbergasted). So I asked the cashier what exactly a Buck Double was. She informed me it had two patties and one slice of cheese. Yes it appears the "Buck Double" is a double cheeseburger...minus one slice of cheese.

And so I reach another installment of "Whatever, I Do What I Want." This one goes out to you, Burger King. I hope that you can sleep at night knowing you are depriving millions of Americans their second slice of cheese. In a world of cutting corners, I never expected it to come to this. Well you know what, Burger King? Your plan BACKFIRED! By taking off that second piece of cheese, and altering the crucial cheese ratio, you allow the taste of your "beef" to shine through, unmasked by American goodness. And you know what, Burger King? Your "beef" just doesn't cut it for me. Asking customers to pay an extra 19 cents for a second slice of cheese on a double cheeseburger is vicious with a side of piracy. I really thought The King would never approve something like this.

Buck Double makes this sandwich sound much cooler than it actually is. Chamburger is more accurate. Cheeseburger + hamburger = chamburger. Well I hope you enjoy this marketing plan, Burger King, because the next time I find myself with a craving for a warmish, beef-like product, you can find me at Wendy's. This has been "Whatever, I Do What I Want: Burger King Edition."

Monday, May 10, 2010

A Quick Congrats

Not a lot of time for a long post, but a BIG congrats to my main man Leggo My Grego. The man of many engles got engaged this weekend, so congratulations, and I wish you all the best.

Should have time for a full post soon. Stay classy!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

WIDWIW: Netflix

Tonight's "Whatever, I Do What I Want" Award goes to Netflix. Now ordinarily I have nothing but good things to say about this corporation. They truly revolutionized the home move watching industry, and their recent addition of streaming movies available instantly is nothing short of incredible.

This morning I received an email from Netflix. It said that I could forward this email to my family and friends, and they would get a free one month trial of Netflix. I'll admit it, I was flattered. After all, when I decided I would give Netflix a shot, I went to their website and signed up for a free TWO WEEK trial. But that was just for anyone. Now, they appreciate my customer-ship so much that they are more than doubling that trial time for my friends and family only? Wow, Netflix. You really outdid yourself.

Except they didn't. I was shortly informed that the free trial offered on their main website is now ALSO one month. So what does that mean? It means that if you want to get a 1-month free trial of Netflix, you can either (a) receive a special email from me, which Netflix has advised to forward to my family and friends; or (b) go to

Thank you for making me feel special, Netflix, only to smash my feelings to pieces. I thought your offer was special. I had no idea you were giving it away to anyone who came a-browsing. I suppose I can forgive you, as long as you keep streaming movies and sending me new ones in the mail too. Either way, you've still done enough to earn yourself a WIDWIW Award.